


The Witch Is My Wing Man

by MadManta



Series: Midnight Purple [1]
Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII
Genre: Anal Sex, Big Dick Rude Is Canon, Bottom Rude, Bouncer Rude, Exhibitionism, Fluff, Frottage, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pre-game storyline, Recreational Drug Use, Rude has Piercings, Soft Rude, Top Reno, oblivious boys, sassy Aerith, some OOC because drugs, sometimes you gotta live a little, the Final Fantasy equivalent of MDMA, wingman Aerith
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-10
Updated: 2020-05-10
Packaged: 2021-03-02 23:20:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24105082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MadManta/pseuds/MadManta
Summary: Rude is required to 'check in' on the Ancient living in the Sector 5 slums because Tseng wants him to. He hates doing it, because the Ancient -- or rather, the witch -- is very good at reading him. It's unnerving. And he's almost starting to like her.Alternative title: Eyeballs: The Fic
Relationships: Reno/Rude (Compilation of FFVII), implied Aerith Gainsborough/Zack Fair
Series: Midnight Purple [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1742764
Comments: 16
Kudos: 130





	The Witch Is My Wing Man

**Author's Note:**

> FF7:Remake and FF7 have some canon splitting differences; in the OG, the Turks don’t really know Aerith beyond the first introduction to her. In Remake it’s clear by Elmyra’s questioning about Rude that he’s been there before, lots of times. I love this. I’m sticking with that. I do regret the club name I used, please forgive me. It’s just such a funny name.  
> Also sorry if some of this seems OOC, just...just turn your brain off and turn on some bass-heavy music.

Rude hated Ancient duty.

On a weekly basis, Rude and his partner tore apart thugs and saboteurs. They beat men within an inch of their lives, and some far beyond that. They protected important men and women with their own lives. Their jobs were heavy and required a cool, detached demeanor. He was good at it. So was Reno, if a bit more excitable in his bloodlust.

However, every other month or so, Tseng stuck him with the tedious and _frequently_ embarrassing task of attempting to persuade one irritating florist to come back with them to be… Well, Rude didn’t really know _what_ they wanted to do with her. That didn’t matter, since he was fairly sure her stubborn ass was never going to come with.

Rude’s finely polished shoes clicked against the wooden boards of the bridge leading towards the Gainsborough household. He sighed, tightening his gloves on his hands. If there was any evidence that an Ancient was powerful, it was this hollow in the slums: rushing water, chirruping bugs, bright green grass and ferns, and an over-the-top amount of blooming flowers, no matter the time of year. There was something both warm and calming about this place, as well as deeply unsettling. Like he knew he wasn’t supposed to be here.

He strode down to the front door, and let his less intimidating neutral face fall into place. That one was much more different than his _bodyguard_ neutral face. And different still from the _assassin_ neutral face. Rude contained multitudes, but it wasn’t like anyone ever appreciated it. He gave the door four sharp knocks. Well, he thought, momentarily distracted, _almost_ anyone—

“Rude! Come in,” Elmyra said as she opened the door. She stepped aside. “I was just making some tea. Would you like some?”

Rude gave a curt nod, and then glanced around the living room, in the kitchen, up the stairs, without so much as moving his face. His covered eyes flicked about, unnoticed as Elmyra wiped her hands off on her apron. “What brings you out here?”

“…the usual,” Rude supplied quietly. Elmyra set a god-awful mug in front of him, the white porcelain sculpted into some kind of moogle. She’d put cream and sugar in his tea already. He picked it up gratefully. “Where is she?”

Elmyra ignored the question. “You know, you can just tell me that you’re here to see me,” she demurred, knowing it wasn’t true but letting herself enjoy the joke. “You know she comes home when it’s about to get dark out, yet you still come when it’s light.”

Rude looked scandalized for a moment, putting the tea down. That _was_ true. But it was fairly _close_ to evening, and besides, sometimes it was just nice to stop and smell the flowers. Literally. He liked this place, how the artificial sunlight sparkled through misted water. It reminded him of cities away from this place, that still had green plants. “Uh,” he stuttered, and then just stared down at the ugly little mug. A frown tugged at his lips as he looked at it. It was pretty damn charming. He resented that.

Everything in this place was charming and warm, and it did feel wrong to be here for his bi-monthly Sweetheart Intimidation. At least, that’s what Reno had been calling it and rolling his eyes. He pushed the mug back. “…”

“She was selling flowers top side,” Elmyra hummed conversationally. She was drinking as well. Rude knew she took it with no sugar, just cream. He ground his teeth together, annoyed that this was part of that info bank he was keeping in his head. You know, in case it was needed for _a report_. That was definitely the reason. He didn’t have a fond bone in his body for—

“Mister Rude!” Aerith called from behind him. The door had been pushed open while he’d been lost in thought, like an idiot. “What a, um… nice surprise.” Aerith wasn’t one to roll her eyes, but it was hard for her to be anything but sarcastic with the Turks.

“Aerith,” he said, standing immediately, thankful for the excuse to stop looking at that sentimental mug. Kupo. “Have you reconsidered—”

“Is that tea?” Aerith bulldozed, placing her walking stick against the wall, and sliding her flower basket onto the dining room table.

“Yes, my dear,” Elmyra said, a small grin lighting up her face. Rude was perfectly aware they were making fun of him. That definitely made this worse. “It’s still brewed back there. Why don’t you join us?”

“Sure, if Mister Rude sits down and drinks with us properly,” Aerith said. That wicked, wicked girl. Rude stammered even in his silence, and then forced himself to stuffily sit back in the chair. That mug stared back at him. _Drink me,_ _kupo_ _!_ God damn _moogles_.

“Do you get stars topside, Mister Rude?” Aerith asked, leaning her head back from the kitchen as she fixed herself a cup. “I never stay up there late enough. But I don’t know if the reactors’ smog prevents you from seeing them or not. I always wondered.”

Rude squeezed one gloved hand tightly. The leather squeaked. “No. Light pollution.” He picked up the tea.

“That’s too bad. I miss them. But I have dreams with them, sometimes.” Aerith daintily sat herself down next to her mother, across from Rude. Her bright green eyes leveled on him. _Pinned_ him. It was unnerving. “Have you seen them before?”

Rude looked away. “Yes.” He sipped at his drink. He was seconds from throwing the mug and bolting out o f there. Why _was_ he still there? Ah, right. His job. “Have you reconsidered coming back with me, this time? We can offer your mother wealth, protection…”

“Protection from what?” Elmyra said cheekily.

“Protection from _who_?” Aerith added, and brought her cup up to her lips with both hands. Her scary eyes lit with amusement.

“You can’t say it doesn’t appeal to you,” Rude said plainly.

“I may be in the slums, but I’ve carved out a nice little oasis for myself,” Elmyra said, gesturing with one hand. “I’d like to stay here and I’d like my daughter with me. I don’t think there’s much more on the planet that appeals to me more than that.”

Aerith placed the tea down. “So I assume that means…”

“I’ll be leaving, then,” Rude said, right on schedule. He turned away, thankful to get out of the gaze of both that adorable witch _and_ her stupid moogle mug.

“Heading back to your team?”

“…”

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Aerith said, and breezed past Rude. It made the hair on his arms stand up how she managed to do that. Her boots were so chunky and over-sized, how did she move so quietly? “Why don’t you take one of these to your partner?”

He turned towards her. She was holding out an almost too-perfect lily, full and yellow and heavy on its stem. “…”

“He’ll like it! I bet he’ll grill you about where you got it. C’mon.”

He felt a strange warmth color his cheeks as he snatched the flower. “…Take care of yourself,” he grumbled, and stomped out of the house. He didn’t turn back, already able to hear the exuberant “Good night, Mister Rude!” from the front door.

He did let himself smell the flower as he made his way to the train station. It was nice.

Still hated Ancient duty.

* * *

“Yoo, _finally!_ He returns!” Reno jumped out of his chair. “I’m starved. Let’s go grab something to eat.”

Rude’s shoulders stiffened as he stepped into their office. Of course Reno was still here. “I have to write up my report,” he said, carefully turned away from Reno as he slid past.

Reno gave a blustery sigh. “Are you kidding me?” He threw himself back into his chair, head falling off the back of it in exasperation. “I been waiting here for hours, willing to take you out for a pizza or some’n, and you don’t even want it?”

“You should go get something to eat,” Rude said casually, unbuttoning his suit jacket as he sat down. He pulled the flower out of his jacket pocket, and it was surprisingly still in perfect condition. “You turn into a total bitch when you don’t eat.” The corner of his mouth turned up.

“ _Me_? First of all, how could—yo! _Rude!_ ” Reno was up out of his chair again, taking three fast steps until he was seated on the edge of Rude’s desk. “You got me a lily? I fuckin’ love those. Flower of death, you know? Give it here.”

Rude stared in mild confusion at the flower between his fingers, and then up to Reno. Reno was gazing genuinely at the flower with big eyes — dilated pupils, even —and Rude found himself blushing the second time that evening as he handed it over.

The adorable witch was the blame for this.

“Where’d you even get this?” Reno asked, lightly fingering one of the petals and then inhaling deeply. “Damn, it even smells good. It must be real. I haven’t seen one like this in a long time.”

Rude cleared his throat, opening up his terminal to quickly type up the same bland report for Tseng:

_Status Report. Ancient still safe with caretaker. Did not consent to being brought in. Still selling flowers topside. No other useful information available at this time._

The problem was that Reno now wanted to go out for dinner after he’d just gotten a flower and was gushing about it in such a way that Rude just wanted to sink into his chair and pad this report into a three hundred page novel. Anything to avoid—

“You ignoring me, yo?”

“The Ancient girl grows them,” Rude said flatly.

“ _She_ gave you this?” Reno crowed. “You gonna take her out on the town? Take her to a real restaurant that don’t smell like the slums? Convince her to come in that way?”

Rude choked. “No!” He pressed his lips together, and then blew out a slow breath. “No. She was irritating as usual, and then insisted I take a flower because...” He remembered her words suddenly, and his face felt hotter. He was glad for his darker complexion; it would be hard for Reno to tell. It was infuriating enough that it was happening at all. “Well, it doesn’t matter. It was from her.”

Reno grinned. “No, no, go on. Why? Because she’s got a big teenage crush on _you_? Hey, she legal, partner?”

“Yes she’s legal—that’s not the point!” Rude hissed.

“Tell me, you big ape.”

Rude pressed ‘submit’ on the report and then folded his arms, irritated. “She told me to take it because you’d like it. That you’d drill me about it.” He sighed. “She was right. That damn witch.”

Reno stared at him for a moment, and then burst into a cackle. “She played you good, yo!” He sat back on the desk, one foot kicking out as he tapped the flower petals lightly against his own chest. Rude turned his head to look elsewhere, though his eyes darted over to watch the flower slap softly against bare flesh. He felt a bead of sweat roll down behind his ear. “How’d she know I liked lilies?”

“Everyone likes real flowers, doesn’t even matter,” Rude muttered. “Look. I’ll go get something to eat with you if we can just drop this. I hate dealing with the Ancient and I don’t want to keep thinking about how pointless these trips to the slums are. Deal?”

Reno stared at him skeptically, and then shrugged. “Okay. But I’m keepin’ the flower,” he said, and tucked it behind his ear. It was strange to see something so sweet and soft in contrast to his angular face. It was a good contrast.

Rude swallowed a lump in his throat as they made their way out, cursing the girl under his breath.

* * *

The pair ended up in one of Reno’s favorite dives with cushy pleather booths full of tears and lots of buzzing neon lights that turned your face black and red and blue. The pizza turned into five very large, frothy beers, when Reno reneged on the deal. Rude had had so much to drink he didn’t even care.

“But like, how did she know I liked lilies, partner?”

Rude was slouched in the booth. “She didn’t. She just acts like she knows everything.” He waved a hand dismissively. “She just does that, she gets in your head and makes you think—weird shit. It doesn’t matter.”

“Sounds like she got into your head real good, partner,” Reno wheedled. “Are you _sure_ you don’t have a big weird crush on her?”

“Not my type,” Rude huffed.

“I feel like I should meet this chick. See if I can crack some of these mind games. Maybe it’d make your life better.”

Rude frowned. “‘s probably not a good idea,” he half-slurred. “You’re…” His eyebrows drew down together. He did not want to finish that thought out loud.

“Oh no, _no_ partner, you better spit that out right now!” Reno laughed. Rude swore his teeth almost looked sharp when he got like that. Damn predators everywhere.

“You’re… _abrasive_?” Rude said tentatively, and Reno stared at him.

“What’s that s’posed to mean? You think I’d rough up the goods? And then deal with _Hojo_ because of it? No thanks, yo. I’d rather cut my own ponytail off.”

“Oh no,” Rude deadpanned, “not the hair.”

Reno grabbed the long rat tail, clutching it possessively. “You know I got great hair, asshole, don’t be jealous. And quit fuckin’ changin’ the subject, yo! I’m coming with you next time. And that’s final.” He nodded resolutely, twisting his hair in his long fingers. Rude pointedly did _not_ look.

“Tseng will have to approve.”

“Tseng _will_ approve,” Reno shrugged. “That professional-ass bitch loves me. I mean, he hates my shirts and my hair and possibly my mouth, but he loves the rest.”

“The bloodthirsty loyal dog?” Rude chuckled.

“You got it,” Reno laughed, and tipped back the last of his beer. “So when do we go out next? Next week?”

“I can’t believe you’re eager to visit the witch,” Rude groaned. “And no, it won’t be for two months.”

“Two _months!?_ Why didn’t you take me this time, you inconsiderate asshole! …Buy me another beer, to make up for it.”

Rude did.

* * *

“This place is a dump,” Reno said with disgust as they entered the Sector 5 slums church. The pews were in fairly good condition — a sign that not many came to church, whether to worship or to vandalize — and there were still a few frosted and stained glass windows intact. Otherwise, the floorboards were coming apart everywhere, particularly near where the altar would have been. Instead a meadow of flowers was blooming, the smell so strong that it felt like holy incense, pollen sparkling with dust motes in the fake sunlight. The stones in the walls were crumbling and full of dead moss and cobwebs. An asthmatic would probably keel over the second they stepped through the big crooked doors.

Reno swung his mag rod over his shoulder, and would never say it out loud, but: he liked this place. A dump, yes, but it was definitely the kind of place he’d come with his junky friends to worship Death. There were lilies growing out of the ground, after all. He chuckled out a tilted smile. It was a fucked up place, but in a pretty way.

“Aw, I think it’s nice,” a bubbly voice said from behind him, and Reno jumped forward, swinging around. The Ancient was standing behind both him and Rude, leaning forward just a bit with both hands behind her back. A nervous line of electricity traced over Reno’s shoulders. How did she do _that_? “Mr. Rude. Mr…?” Her eyes rose to meet Reno’s, and he found himself annoyed that he’d let her get to him. Reno knew how to talk to pretty girls. This would be a cake walk.

“Reno,” he drawled, stepping up to her with confident swagger. He swore he heard Rude chuff with irritation behind him. “You must be the mysterious Gainsboroff.”

“Oh,” she said, then tapped her nose. “Bor-oh. And there’s nothing mysterious about little old _me_. I’m just a florist.” She tipped her head, bringing her other hand from around her back, where she held a basket half full of flowers. “If you’ll pardon me…”

She walked past him, not even allowing them to touch, and Reno sucked at his teeth. “So,” he said, voice growing nasal with authority. “You own this place? The rights to these flowers, yo?”

He watched her shoulders stiffen and he smirked, mouth spreading wide. Gotcha.

“Shinra doesn’t encourage organized religion,” Aerith hummed a moment later, and then kneeled down in front of her flower patch. Reno thought of the one he’d gotten to touch those few months ago. He wanted another one. “So the real owners of this place… Who knows? Certainly nothing’s practiced here anymore. And besides.” She pulled a pair of snips out of her red bolero. “I planted these from seed.”

Reno tsked. “Tschyeah, right. Where did you get seeds?”

“Oh, I have my ways,” she said with a sing-song tone. “Did you like my flower, Mr. Reno?”

He choked for a moment. He felt Rude step up next to him, about to step in, but Reno held out his hand to the side. “What flower?”

Then Aerith finally turned around, pinning Rude angrily with her gaze. “Rude! You didn’t give him the flower? But why not? Ooh, wait.” Her expression changed again, and Reno could feel Rude’s flustered madness growing. “Did you find a pretty woman and give it to her instead?”

And Rude’s flustered madness? Oh, Reno was all about exploiting that. He stepped away from his partner, swinging the rod to his other shoulder. “ _Oh!_ You mean the one Rude gave me, what, three months ago?”

Aerith’s green eyes moved to Reno, and then closed with a smile. “Two.”

“Right! Right. Two months ago. I thought you were asking him out.”

Aerith scanned Rude, head to toe and back down again, and the look was _blatant_. “Not my type,” she said. “Strong and silent, sure. But I love big, ridiculous hair.” She giggled. “It’s a curse.” Rude was _radiating_ discomfort, and Reno was thriving off of it.

Reno thought back to that conversation, of Rude stuttering, _Not my type_. So _that_ was why he didn’t want them to meet: Reno was definitely gonna take advantage of his own big, ridiculous hair. Unfortunately, Rude must have known his plan. “That’s _very_ interesting, Aerith, but you know why we’re here. You coming back with us?”

“Absolutely not,” Aerith said sweetly, and then got to her feet. She dusted off her skirt at the knees and then nodded. “Especially not back with you, Reno,” she tittered at him. “But, if you promise to buy flowers from me later, I’ll give you one now, for free.” She held out a lily, so plump and healthy it looked like fruit.

Reno was caught off guard. “Whaddya mean, especially not—”

“I know that look. I’ve dated boys from Shinra, you know,” she teased. “Anyway, take it.”

Reno did, even as he said, “What makes you think I want a stupid flower?”

“Have a good evening, Mr. Rude! And Reno, too,” Aerith called, as she walked straight out the front doors.

Reno stood there for a moment, staring, and then clutched the flower so hard that he inadvertently crushed it. “How did she… Ah! Shit.” He looked down at the destroyed flower, and let it fall out of his hands.

Rude shrugged. “She’s a witch. Can we go get a drink, now?”

“Sure, partner,” Reno muttered nervously. They got on the first train to the plate, Reno’s nose still twitching from pollen. He sneezed and a nervous Shinra middle manager moved three seats away from him.

It was a weird day.

* * *

Reno leaned against the wall with a lit cigarette, staring up at the sky. At night, the sky was a washed out gray: an inky black full of lights filtered through the mako fog that spilled from the reactors. He sighed. The sooner Rude finished up, the sooner he could stop being introspective and sad.

He glanced around the corner, where Rude was roughing up a particularly talkative suspect. For months they’d been sniffing out factions of anti-Shinra extremists. Many were easy enough to snuff out with a well placed gas can and a match, but others just kept hanging on. He leaned back, inhaled deeply, and then heard the sound of Rude’s leather-clad hands slapping the dumb jibber-jabberer. He smirked around the cigarette.

“One more time,” Rude muttered, and Reno heard the man repeat his words very quickly and messily. Hopefully Rude caught it, because Reno sure as hell didn’t. Rude seemed satisfied, though, as the man wormed his way free of Rude’s grasp and practically sprinted out of the alleyway.

“Avalanche,” Rude said as he stepped up to Reno. He straightened his tie, his gloves, his jacket, and then his sunglasses. “Again.”

“They’ve been pretty hard to stamp out,” Reno huffed. Rude brought his hand up to Reno’s face to snatch the cigarette from his lips to take a drag.

“Pain in my ass,” Rude muttered, taking one more stressed puff, and then placed it carefully back into Reno’s lips. “Come on. Let’s get back to Tseng.”

Reno was a pro at keeping himself in check, so he turned away as he felt a blush flame up his freckled cheeks. The smell of those leather gloves ticked off some primitive desire that he didn’t know he had. And he’d been so comfortable to just almost touch his mouth, and he’d just pushed around some little terrorist… Rude had already started walking away, so he jumped after him, cigarette dropping from his lips, forgotten in the alley.

“Yeah!” he called, catching up and sticking his hands in his pockets. “Tseng.” Reno kept his gaze on the street. The walk back to their car was quiet.

* * *

“Oh, thank goodness! It’s Rude. Come in, please. Do you think you could… help me with something?”

Rude was more or less hurried into the Gainsborough home by the nervous mother. She disappeared into the kitchen, into a closet, and then came back out again with a small box in her hand. “We don’t have a ladder any more, and the lightbulb above the kitchen table has gone out…” She opened the box, which contained a sad set of bulbs which were certainly not new. She’d carried them as if they were. It made Rude feel a little sad. He looked up.

“Without a ladder…?”

“Normally we put a chair on the table, and then a bucket on the chair, and then it’s usually Aerith on her tip-toes while I hold it steady—”

Rude looked horrified for a second. How often did the Ancient almost die from them having to _change light bulbs?_ “Of course,” he said, and glanced around. “Think I’ll only need the chair.”

After replacing the bulb, he’d mumbled if she had any other light bulbs that needed changing. He changed them all. When Aerith came through the front door, Rude was drinking a cup of tea out of one of the nice mugs, sleek and black with soft green and red flowers painted on it. He’d pulled off his suit jacket and gloves. When Aerith saw him, she squealed before clamping her hands over her mouth in delight. Rude cleared his throat, thanked Elmyra for the tea, put his jacket and gloves back on, and high-tailed it out of there.

“He didn’t even ask about me,” Aerith mused, watching him jog away from their cottage. “Mom, are you dating Mr. Rude?”

“What, him? No, sweetie,” Elmyra laughed. “I think he just needed something… Nice to do, for an old lady.”

“You’re not that old, mom,” Aerith teased, and then looked up. “Did he…?”

“Every broken bulb in the house. Next time, he said he’d clean out my gutters.”

“Are you _sure_ you’re not dating him?”

The next time he came out, he had brought a step stool, swung himself up on the roof, and cleaned the gutters.

The time after that, Aerith was outside, struggling with a large boulder that had fallen into one of the small creeks and was blocking water from flowing. He jumped in, gloves and all, to push it out of the way. She’d given him a kiss on the cheek.

Reno wouldn’t stop making fun of him when he showed back up at HQ, wet as Leviathan. “What the hell happened to you?”

“…Landscaping,” Rude muttered, and made his way to the locker room, a wet trail behind him. Nobody followed.

* * *

Reno spotted the target down the block. She was standing near a busy club, mostly ignored, but occasionally she would turn on the charm and exchange flowers for what looked like a substantial amount of gil.

He sidled up next to her. “What are you doing up here, Flower Girl?”

“It’s not nice to forget people’s names, Reno,” Aerith said calmly. She didn’t look at him, instead smiling at another drunk clubber, and then past Reno at his very large shadow. “Hi, Mr. Rude.” He waved soundlessly.

“The hell are you doing, _Aerith_?” Reno spat.

“What does it look like I’m doing, Rattail?” Aerith teased.

Reno choked. “Ex _cuse_ me?”

Rude _definitely_ didn’t stifle a laugh. Why would he laugh at such a mean, hilarious thing?

“I’ve never been in a club before,” she segued, leaving Reno sputtering. “But it must be nice. Most of them come out looking delirious and pay real well for a couple of flowers. I’d be nuts not to sell to these folks.” She finally looked up at Reno, and suddenly he felt that pinning gaze that Rude had talked about. It hadn’t been so intensely focused on him before. “There’s no rule against that, is there?”

Reno had to look away before he said ‘duh’. “Never been to a club, huh?” Changing the subject was a safer line of conversation. As if Reno knew the first thing about ‘licensed flower sellers’. He chewed on a toothpick. “Maybe Rude and I oughta take you in there. Safer in there than out here. Who knows what kinda chumps could just mug you out here.”

“As opposed to in the dark of a club?” Rude asked. The eyeroll was audible, if not visible.

“Ooh, really?” Aerith asked, and her expression turned excited. “I’d definitely go, but only if Mr. Rude joined us. He seems like he could keep any bandits at bay.”

“ _NO_. Reno, what are you doing?” Rude hissed, grabbing his partner by the arm. “It’s bad enough you’re just antagonizing her out here, but this has nothing to do with us.”

“Aw, come on. Bet you’ve never been inside a club either, partner,” Reno goaded.

“Reno—”

“C’mon,” Aerith wheedled, grabbing Rude’s arm in the same place he had grabbed Reno’s. “Not tonight. But, you know. Eventually. It’ll be fun!” She tapped her nose. “I won’t even tell Mr. Tseng.”

Both of them stared at her. “You talk to…?”

“Not if I can help it. Whatever! Pick me up on Friday. I’ll be here. Now get out of here! You’re scaring away my best customers.”

They walked away, and Rude snatched Reno’s arm again. “What did you just set us up for?”

“Hey, watch the jacket, partner,” Reno said, shrugging his arm away. “And besides. I set us up for _fun_. You know. For your favorite quarry.”

“…”

A few evenings later, a disgruntled Rude was being dragged behind an irritated Reno. Rude had spent the past day and a half attempting to convince Reno that Aerith had been yanking them around, while Reno had been purposely ignoring him in favor of only thinking of a night out with the one person he had been attempting to get to go out with him for _years_.

Reno _liked_ dancing, even before he had joined the Turks, but it was hard to enjoy when you weren’t out with someone you really wanted to spend time with. He could imbibe — drinks and pills — on his own, but what was the joy in that? This was his _chance_. Though knowing Rude, he’d bail after the first twenty minutes of thumping music. Still: it was worth it, for those twenty minutes of awkwardly dragging him into the bodies and getting lost.

He practically forgot the reason they were there until she stepped out from behind a bodega fruit stand: the Ancient, with her hair down (rookie mistake, Reno thought) and in a skirt that was so short he thought he might have picked her up in a dive bar. In a different world, anyway.

“Shit,” he muttered, tugging at his jacket. He was covered, for once, zipped up to the neck, but his pants were decidedly two sizes tighter than Turks uniform standard. He smacked Rude on the chest with the back of his hand. “Told you she wasn’t yanking us around, dumbass,” he chuckled.

Rude looked, and his nose crinkled like he was squinting. “Feels wrong.”

“Jeez, listen to you, grandpa. _Are_ you dating her mom?” Reno teased.

Rude swatted Reno’s head.

“Aren’t we well behaved?” Aerith asked. She’d spotted them while they bickered, skipping over to them. Short skirt, cute blouse that dipped a little too much, and still she wore those enormous leather boots. Reno wondered where she got her terrible fashion sense. Rude wondered, somewhat worriedly, who she had talked to to borrow that skirt and shirt.

“You’re legal, right?” Reno asked, tipping his head back.

“Gross,” Aerith said, sticking her tongue out. “Come on. I can practically feel the music from out here!”

They were two doors down from the club, _Earth Rave_ , and neither could disagree with her. She turned and headed towards the club, a heavy beat rumbling the ground under their feet. Aerith was pretty, and was let in with no trouble. Reno got in with some pushing of him around, and the bouncer simply said, “Eeey! Rude! C’mon through.”

Aerith’s eyes were wide, taking in the fog rushing towards the ceiling, lasers bouncing off of the smoke and refracting into attractive patterns. She nodded assertively to herself and headed straight to the bar.

Not that Reno noticed, immediately yanking Rude forward. “What the hell?” he hissed into his friend’s ear. “Why did the bouncer know you?”

“…long story. Where’d she go?” Rude asked, pulling away. He glided towards the bar. Reno let out an exasperated huff, unzipping his jacket and stuffing it behind a couch. Nobody was gonna make off with a cheap jacket like that. In the dark of the club, he felt more at ease. His shirt was thin, see-through, but was covered in soft velvet patterns. He wiped his hands off on it, and its pleasant texture calmed him down. He never regretted this shirt. Other than the cold, outside.

Reno quickly trotted to the bar, pushing past a sweaty couple to where Rude was standing. He leaned against the bar, practiced, and Reno felt more suspicious. Next to him was Aerith, who had just received her boozy soda. She grinned up at Rude, and then even at Reno as he slid up. “Thanks for the drink, but I’m gonna go um,” she pulled the straw out of her drink and gestured, “ _mingle_?”

“What, no—”

“That sounds like a _great_ idea, Aerith,” Reno said, and let her push past him.

“Nice shirt!” she giggled, and then in a flash of strobe light, she was gone.

“It _is_ a good shirt,” Reno preened, pulling up to Rude to get the bartender’s attention.

“You can’t just—I already ordered for you,” Rude said, putting his hand on Reno’s down into the bar. “You can’t just let her get out of here.”

“What’s the worst that could happen? Okay, forget I asked that. Nothing is going to happen,” Reno said, though he had a feeling he was babbling. Rude’s hand was bare. Reno had noticed when he’d stopped to pick him up just how he looked: equally _non-regulation_ trousers, though still in a black button-down with the sleeves rolled up.

Reno was gonna die tonight. It was probably worth it. “Anyway, you’re looking at her like she’s your little sister or something. She’s not. Let her go live, all we did was sneak her in.”

“And buy her drink,” Rude sighed, letting go of Reno’s hand.

“Ha! I knew you wanted to make a good impression. What’s the deal with her?”

“I don’t know,” Rude muttered. He reached up to rub his eyes, and just pulled his sunglasses off. It was dark in here. He didn’t mind. “She’s just got that thing, that she does.”

Reno managed not to bite his lip. This was privileged information he was being given. This was too good. A moment later, his usual drink of choice was palmed into his hand. Rude picked up his bottled beer, and clinked it to Reno’s glass.

“Why did the bouncer know you, Rude?”

“I used to work here.”

Reno did _not_ spit his drink out. He was still feeling particularly pleased that Rude had known what to order for him. Best not to spill that. “You _what_?”

“What did you think I did, before I joined up?” Rude asked, a soft smirk coming to his lips. “Think I jumped out of the womb into the Turks?”

“Were _you_ a _bouncer_?” Reno gasped, even as his lips settled on the edge of his drink to slurp.

“Yes.”

“Have you been a bouncer at _other_ places?”

“Yes.”

“ _Partner!_ ” Reno shouted, grabbing his partner’s shoulder. “Are you _fucking kidding me!_ ”

“Four clubs in Midgar,” Rude said. He leaned close to Reno to speak. It was loud, after all. “Two in Junon.”

“If this drink wasn’t so good,” Reno yelled. “If this _beat_ wasn’t so good. I’d be furious, yo! I have been _trying_ to get you to come out for _years—_ ”

“I know.” Rude leaned to Reno’s other side. Both ears now, blessed with closeness to Rude’s lips. “I didn’t really like coming back to old stomping grounds, Reno.”

“You’re not working, partner,” Reno hissed, and let his lips touch Rude’s ear. It felt hot and cold: hot skin, cold jewelry. “You’re too important to give a fuck about that shit. Dance with me.”

“Reno…”

“Do you wanna roll?”

Rude pulled back then, staring at him. Rude’s eyes were so warm and dark, Reno felt his chest tighten. He usually only got to see this unfiltered in the aftermath of a hangover. Reno’s lips fell into an easy smile. “C’monnn. I have two for you. Two for me.”

“Reno.”

“ _Part_ ner,” Reno said. He snatched Rude’s chin, thumb lightly grazing his goatee as he turned Rude’s face. There, near the dance floor, was Aerith, smiling up at a very handsome man with ridiculous, big black hair. When he’d glanced to the side in a laugh, in the dimness of the club, the mako of his eyes shined. “Let your baby sister have some _fun_. And then, let _me_ have some fun with _you_ , for once in your goddamn life. Well, once in your post-bouncer life.”

Rude stared at them until it was clear she could take care of herself. He turned away, realizing he didn’t have his shades on. “You want to take drugs, with me.”

“Yes.”

“Right now.”

“Yes, you _mother fucker_.”

“……”

“ _RUDE!_ ”

“Okay, fine. But only,” Rude said, leaning back so that Reno could properly look at him, his head haloed in the light show behind him, “if we keep an eye on her.”

Reno crowed with success, pulled out two gel caps, pressed them into Rude’s hands, and then swallowed his own with his fruity drink.

Reno got his twenty minutes. The two danced on the floor, separated now that they did not have to talk, just enjoying the constant thrum as the music crested and gave heavy drops. Lights flickered, dying the room different glowing colors, and then the lights looked a bit more sparkly, and the music felt a bit more pleasant in his chest, and Rude was up next to him again.

“Oh,” Rude said, eyes shut, and laughed, and Reno let his smile slip into a lazy one as he let himself fall forward into Rude.

“Did you get there?”

“Just now,” he murmured, “c’mere.”

Not that Reno had to move, but instead he moved his arms up around Rude’s neck. He was hot and the back of his neck was wet, but Reno liked the feeling. There was a moment where his heart rushed that his stomach may have turned upside down, and then it settled as Rude’s arms wrapped around his waist.

Reno purred, and did not let himself think about it too much.He wasn’t gonna let his brain ruin this. The pleasantly platonic pressing of a pair of perfect bodies. He could feel Rude’s thumbs sliding over the fun velvety patterns of his shirt, and the hum of bass in their touching legs, and Rude’s pressed shirt against his own cheek. His whole body felt warm and good, and then the music ended with a sharp high-hat before blasting into another. Rude moved his hands, grabbing one of Reno’s, and pulled him out of the throng of bodies.

Reno blinked as they made their way outside; not the front door, but a side-door. The music was dulled, and there were quaint lights and heat lamps and dozens of scantily clad club goers smoking. Rude flicked sunglasses out of who knows where, and then pulled out two cigarettes. Reno was jealous of the sunglasses, but grabbed one.

“Just a reprieve,” Rude said quietly, lighting his cigarette and then leaned forward to light Reno’s cigarette, hands cupping around the tip to keep the wind from whipping it out.

Reno inhaled. Menthol. He stared up at Rude with amused suspicion. “You’ve done this before.”

One eyebrow lifted above the lenses. “Maybe.”

“You hardly smoke, much less _menthols_. You’ve done this before.”

Rude shrugged. “I’ve dabbled.”

“You worked at a club and _dabbled_ , huh?”

Rude’s expression softened into a grin. “Usually not, but occasionally. It’s nice to do it now, without having to…worry. Do you really think I’d just take a pill with you while we have to protect the girl, without knowing what it’d do to me?” He looked away, at a crowd of young women and men bickering over a sports match. “But, I’m… having fun.”

Reno looked away, knowing the expression on his face was a dumb smile. Unfortunately, his looking away didn’t stop Rude from seeing it. “Are you?” Rude pressed, nudging Reno’s shoulder with his.

“Yes, dammit, fuck off,” Reno laughed, swatting lightly at him. They finished their cigarettes and then slid black into the club. Rude’s sunglasses disappeared, and their dancing continued. This time Reno slid up behind a woman to dance with her, not wanting to be too easy. But Rude was clever, and just found a woman opposite her, sliding his hands up and down the fishnet texture of her dress. He leaned down to whisper something to her, and she laughed, swinging her full body into his arms. Reno was having a good time, enough that he put up with that for a good five minutes before patting his dance partner on the hip and then leaving her be.

Instead of pushing the woman out of Rude’s arms, Reno slid up behind Rude, and Rude just laughed, leaning his head back a bit. Reno laughed against his ear, and they danced. After Rude seemed sufficiently distracted, the second woman left, and Rude turned into Reno’s arms, dancing with only him, again. 

It was hot and sweaty and felt so _good_ , cleansing. Reno wanted this man more than he could say but he didn’t feel the need to push it. Just dancing with him, enjoying it, touching his shirt and his arms and chest and sides, was enough. No kissing, never kissing, just sliding up against one another, half hard and not caring in the slightest.

Reno looked up at his closed eyes and reached up to slide his thumb over Rude’s cheek. His eyes opened then, dark and warm with very dilated pupils, and Reno accidentally kissed him.

It wasn’t his fault, the honey in those eyes was extremely alluring, and Rude’s own hands slid tighter around Reno’s waist until they slid down to his ass. And then Rude was kissing him back and pushing him. Reno did whatever he wanted, brushing past others until Reno’s back pressed up against a pillar and Rude made sure he was pressed seamlessly against him.

“Reno…”

He didn’t let him say anything else, sliding his hands up over Rude’s neck and pulling him back in. This was probably a mistake, Reno thought, but this close the bulge from Rude’s pants was making him a little stupid. Not to mention the slickness of his tongue, and then Rude’s fingertips sliding up underneath the back of his shirt.

Holy _shit_ Reno wanted to take him home, but he also didn’t want to leave the club. He was afraid the second they stepped past that threshold, this would be gone. The drugs made Rude very affectionate, that was all. Reno hummed out a moan and Rude pulled back. He didn’t say anything, though. No _‘too fast’_ or _‘we should talk about this’_. He just slid a leg between Reno’s and then covered his mouth again, hips twitching against each other to a half time of the heavy beat.

Finally Reno had to stop him, placing his hands on Rude’s hips. They stilled, lips parting. Reno was full of heavy panting breaths. “Gotta stop,” he whispered. “Don’t wanna fuck up my pants.”

Rude leveled his eyes on Reno’s, and it was too honest. Reno’s cock twitched. Rude turned his head a bit to the side. “Aerith.”

Reno’s eyes narrowed. “What the fuck does _she_ —”

“Hi-eeee,” she said, and Reno lurched backwards, only causing the back of his head to slam against the pillar. Rude stepped back while Reno swore. “Well, thanks for bringing me along, but Zack here is gonna escort me home.”

They both turned to look at the tall man with SOLDIER eyes, though he looked embarrassed. “Just want to make sure she gets home safe. Honest.”

“Isn’t he _cute_?” Aerith cooed, hanging onto Zack’s arm. She’d definitely had a few more drinks. “C’mon, we have to get to the train station.”

“Nice to meet uh—” Zack left, dragged by Aerith’s suspiciously strong grip.

Reno swore, reaching up to touch the back of his head. “Fucking ow.”

“Maybe we should follow them.”

“Fuck you, Rude, the witch is my wing man right now. She’s leaving on purpose. You literally just had your tongue—”

Rude leaned forward again, this time with his mouth at Reno’s ear. “Sorry,” he huffed. “I meant, maybe we should _leave_.”

Reno choked. How was Rude the one in charge in this situation? How had he turned all this around on him, made Reno like melted butter? This was not fair in the slightest. He hated being caught on the wrong foot. But Rude just leaned back and gazed at him with those unfairly unfiltered eyes, and Reno nodded, adam’s apple bobbing.

Rude slid his sunglasses on and led them out — Reno stopping to pull his jacket out from behind a couch, and Rude from the actual coat check so that his was still pressed and clean. He pulled his gloves out of his pocket, put them on, and as soon as they hit the street, only Reno looked disheveled.

The sparkling Midgar lights looked so nice, Reno didn’t even mind.

* * *

In the streets, they had stayed a reasonable distance apart. The second they passed through Rude’s door, he slammed Reno back against it. His gloved hands snatched Reno’s wrists, pressing them next to his face. “You still want this?” he asked in a gravelly voice.

“Shit yes,” Reno said, lunging forward to meet Rude’s lips. Rude felt a strange pulse of surprise that twisted into excitement as he let go of Reno’s hands so he could focus on undressing the man instead.

Reno was capable of leading the kiss while Rude unzipped the thin jacket, pushing it off of his shoulders, and then pushed the transparent top up and over. Their lips parted for just a moment as the shirt pulled free, and then they moved back together like magnets as the shirt hit the wall beside them. Rude’s gloved thumbs slid over Reno’s nipples, and Reno let out a needy moan.

“ _Rude_ ,” Reno growled, breaking the kiss. “Can we _please…_ ” But he forgot what he was saying. Rude pulled his sunglasses off, tucked them into his jacket, and leveled his gaze on him. It was that witch’s pinning gaze, and this time it made Reno feel electric. He’d have to thank her later. “Uh…”

Rude pulled him backwards until he felt the couch behind him and moved around it. He sat down on it with a huff, fingers sliding under the waistband of Reno’s jeans as he tugged him over. Reno sat on his lap like it was second nature, thighs straddling Rude’s, and took over kissing again.

Rude was glad that he didn’t have to lead, just happy to peel his gloves off and let his fingers settle on Reno’s back. The more slight man let out another moan and jerked his hips down against Rude’s. Now, in the privacy of his own home, Rude could finally let his guard down. His hands slid around to unfasten Reno’s pants, and Reno’s hands moved in a similar direction. Rude carefully pulled the zipper down and Reno’s hard cock slapped his own belly as it was freed. Rude blinked slowly, pulling back to look down at his cock with a grin. “No underwear?”

“Shut up,” Reno laughed, his own hand sliding into Rude’s open pants. “Why is your dick so big?” Rude’s eyebrows popped up at that, and then he let out a soft groan as Reno fished him out of his black boxer briefs. Reno stared down at him, teasing the foreskin past the head with just two fingers. “God, man.”

“Fuck—just—” Rude was gonna ruin his jacket and his shirt unless he made quick work of them. He stumbled over his own buttons while Reno slowly wrapped his whole fist around him. The tight heat was very distracting and it was possible that he may have ripped a button or two off as he shrugged both items off of his shoulders. Half naked, he was finally able to get his own hand on Reno, who’s hand had stilled completely.

Reno was staring at him, at his chest, with mouth agape. A dark blush spread over Rude’s cheek bones. “What?” he panted, though his mind was buzzing at the velvety feel of Reno in his hand as he pumped it up and down.

Reno’s expression was a strange combination of amused and aroused as he stared. “You pierced ‘em.”

“I like piercings,” Rude mumbled. Reno’s hips were twitching forward into his hand, and so he used his other hand to pull Reno flush against him. That way he could take both of them in one large hand, rubbing them together.

“ _Ho_ ly shit,” Reno hissed. One hand came up to cup the back of Rude’s head, the other sliding behind the small of his back to crush them together. The barbells were skin-warm, and pressed against Reno’s own bare chest in a way that caused him to tremble. Rude’s hand squeezed them tightly, and the slip of pre-cum from Reno made the stroking slicker, noisier. Rude moaned as Reno bent over his shoulder, biting into it to muffle his own desires, riding the feeling. They were still high, though now the only thing that mattered was the slide of flesh and that sparkling warmth that was threatening to spill over radiating from everywhere their bodies were connected.

Rude was the one to whisper, “I’m gonna come,” squeezing a little tighter as he spurted over his own knuckles and Reno’s cock. The effect was instant, just the soft splatter sound causing Reno to follow wright after him, splashing cum over Rude’s fingers and right up between them to cover their bellies. Reno finally let go of his shoulder with his teeth, shuddering forward. His legs relaxed, panting softly.

Rude felt so light headed he wanted to talk, to babble, but instead he let himself enjoy the warm, wet afterglow. Reno’s head lifted and met his. They shared a lazy kiss. Rude’s hand slid out from between them to wipe it off on Reno’s back, which finally caused him to pull back.

“What the fuck—!” he laughed. “Thanks?”

“Let’s get cleaned up,” Rude murmured. His eyes leveled on Reno, who now seemed very flighty. His expression softened. “You can—you should. Stay.”

Reno bit his lip and then forced himself to slide off of Rude’s lap, standing on wobbly legs. “At least now I know why you don’t use the locker room showers.”

“I’m a very private man,” Rude teased. “Don’t need the whole place talking about Rude’s body alterations.”

“More like everyone will ask how you got such a huge _dick_ , asshole,” Reno laughed, and did not offer to help Rude up. His hand was still messy.

Rude’s nose scrunched with embarrassment, wiping his own hand off on his already messy chest. “Come on, shithead,” he chuckled, and led them on a shame march to the bathroom with their pants open. Reno did peel himself out of his shoes and pants while Rude managed to wash his hands and then strip.

The shower was good, and Rude had intended to just get clean, but slippery and warm and the scent of his sage soap was very appealing, especially with Reno pressed close to him. By the time they were clean, they were hard again. Rude turned off the shower and pulled Reno to him. “I want you to fuck me,” he said bluntly.

Reno blinked. “Really? Cause uh…”

“I am going to fuck you _all_ the time, Reno,” Rude murmured, sliding his hands around to Reno’s ass. He squeezed. “But you fed me drugs, and all I want right now is a hard, fast ride.” He blinked slowly at him, grinning. “Too fast to properly stretch you out for my apparently too-large dick.”

“ _Asshole_ ,” Reno repeated, laughing, and hopped out of the shower. He gave them both a cursory rub with a black towel and then pulled Rude by the wrist into the bedroom that Reno had only been in once or twice, mainly to exacerbate a hangover so they could suffer together.

Reno pushed him back onto the bed, putting a hand on his hip. Rude looked up at him, pupils still blown wide, though now more from desire than from the residuals from the pills. This desire was all Rude, nothing artificial, and Reno felt lucky _and_ a little nervous. Rude had a bedside table, because of _course_ he did, and opened the top drawer. Gun, knife, knife, post-it note with gibberish scribbled on it, worse-for-wear paperback, and an under-used bottle of lube. Reno tsked as he pulled it out. “You gotta get laid more, yo.”

“How do you know that’s not a brand new bottle?” Rude purred, and Reno felt his cock bob at the thought of Rude going through bottles of the stuff, jerking off to thoughts of _this_.

Reno’s voice got very low. “Turn over,” he growled.

Rude did, and then he felt Reno practically drape over his back, kissing at the back of his neck as already wet fingers circled his hole. Rude closed his eyes, just focused on the feeling as Reno slid in one finger, then a second, and drove them in and out of him. It was almost too much, forcing him to submit and relax, but it _was_ what he wanted. Reno knew what he was doing, because when he finally let himself relax and his legs fell forward a bit, Reno curved his fingertips, pressing forward. Rude groaned. “Now.”

“I don’t know,” Reno said, the sounds from his fingers sloppy and hot. “I think you could use a bit more.”

“Yes,” Rude ground out, “your _cock_.”

“Hmm…”

Reno pulled his fingers out, pushing Rude over onto his back so Reno could look down at him with an insufferable smirk. Instead of just diving into him, his fingers slid back into Rude, his other hand wrapping around Rude’s stiff, velvety cock.

“Reno—!” Rude’s eyes snapped open. “ _Please?_ ”

“That’s more like it,” Reno grinned, and did smear more lube on before he replaced his fingers with what Rude wanted. He pushed in too fast, but it wasn’t his fault: he sank in easily, and Rude’s lips parted like he was going to fucking sing for it. Reno wasn’t even in control any more, just the lizard-brain part telling him to fuck this man into the mattress. Rude’s legs wrapped around his waist, and Reno’s elbows came down onto the bed. His hips were a machine, eagerly fucking forward as fast as he could.

Rude was floating, the hot feeling of being possessed sending hot strobes of lust through him. Watching Reno pound him made him want to reach down and touch himself, but he didn’t want to come _instantly_ , and he knew he would. Instead he just focused on the bones of Reno’s hips slamming into his thighs and ass, of Reno’s heavy breath and soft moans. Reno’s fingers found his nipple piercings again, lightly flicking and Rude knew he had a good twenty seconds left before he lost it completely.

“Can I come inside you?” Reno panted, burying his face against Rude’s neck. Rude growled, his hand shooting down to grab his cock, desperate now. “Can I fill you up?”

“Fucking— _please_ ,” Rude begged, and then he was shooting his load all over himself, every thrust causing another twitch and stripe of spunk to pump out. When Reno’s hands landed on his shoulders and slammed all the way in with a desperate groan, Rude squeezed himself as the tingling feeling of orgasm continued to pulse through him.

Reno’s hips twitched over and over as he came, overwhelmed at the feeling of pumping his partner full of it. His eyes finally opened, settling on Rude below him, and he was not quite ready for how hot it was, and how warm that made him feel. He needed to separate himself, but instead Rude’s hands came up and crushed them together. Rude hummed out a moan. “Lemme enjoy this,” he slurred.

Reno let himself relax, not saying anything. They held each other in messy silence, save for the heavy breathing, until Reno’s soft cock slipped out of him. “Hey,” he murmured, patting Rude on the hip. “Def gotta clean up, this time.”

Rude hummed as he rolled out of bed. Clean up was quick and thorough, and after several glugs from the bathroom sink, they landed back in bed, slightly away from any lingering wet spots from shower damp bodies.

“We can never see the Ancient again,” Rude mumbled. The room was dark, blinds drawn closed, but still a tiny bit of that light slid in to highlight the angles of their bodies.

“Why?” Reno asked, not caring but wanting to indulge his partner.

“She’ll take one look at me and _know_ ,” he said, frown audible. “She’ll ask questions.”

“Hmm, and I’ll answer them,” Reno agreed.

“Exactly. She’s been torturing me for months. I don’t want to give her the satisfaction.”

“I dunno,” Reno demurred, letting his eyes shut and drift off. “Pretty sure that SOLDIER will give her that.”

“ _Reno!_ ”


End file.
